I will be exactly 26 in a few days and I often find myself dwelling on the past, not necessarily my childhood or adolescence, but the years after graduating from university. Though I kept a big journal, I still wonder how I have got over all of these things. I don’t share my journal, because it’s very personal and I mostly wrote about my relationship with people rather with arts. But I think a journal about arts could be shared, hopefully helping anyone reading get over the feeling of being lost in our 20s.

As a freelance illustrator, summer is often the slow season. People go on holiday, there are no big celebrations and this year, with generative images and recession all over the globe, it’s even a slower summer for me.

I tried to take this as an opportunity to improve my skills and were ambitious when I plan for the summer. I was already ambitious when I wrote down my new year resolutions, even though I have never completely achieve them. I want to continue paint landscape and improve my portrait, storyboard, people in drapery and animals skills.

It was smooth with animals and portraits because I started practicing with them already in spring, I just need to finish them as I go. Storyboarding is surprisingly hard because there are not much to remember, it’s more about imagining a camera running around in space and merge them with your perspective skill. It starts growing too hard and I have to decide to delay learning it, trying another source of book and lectures.

Sketching people in drapery is figure sketching but a new level. I practiced figure sketching with nude models or minimal dressed models so when the big challenge is to imagine how their arms and legs move under the fabric. And choosing what folds to tell the story; there will be folds that can be memorized and folds you just add because of a specific pose.

What I didn’t plan to study is learning to use Procreate, because I’m still not sure whether to get an Ipad or a new laptop. But I decided to get an Ipad, because I prefer something lightweight and minimal. I never fully use and understand Photoshop and it’s too heavy, Procreate works much better for me, it’s just drawing.

Some Procreate sketches

Apart from new skills, I still try to paint landscape both outdoors and with images I gather myself. This summer I painted a lot with my Holbein Acrylic Gouache, which has brighter tones compared to my old Nevskaya Palitra gouache.

It sounds like I have learned and done a lot of things, but actually I felt like a crap all the time. When I started freelancing and studying arts on my own, I believed after a few years, things would get easier and even if I’m not a genius, I must have gather skills and projects along the way. I did gather new skills and projects, but the feeling of having nothing and being nobody is still the same. I guess that the curse of being an artist.

Goodbye Summer. At least we weren’t lazy.